Sunday, February 22, 2009

"Foul language" makes me laugh

Note: The "dirty" words used in this post are only suitable for an "adult" audience. This, of course, is really silly, because anyone who was actually an adult wouldn't get nearly as many laughs out of the subject matter, so I don't know who this post is suitable for. Maybe you? Maybe no one.

Most of my most crisp foul language just comes blurting out without any thought at all. In fact, if I ever stopped to think I probably would choose other, non-"dirty" words. But there is that moment where someone is just driving so stupidly, meandering all over their lane, or going 55 when every else is going 80 (ok, maybe it's just me that's going 80) and suddenly the word "dickwad" just comes flying out of my mouth.

That happened the other day, and I got to thinking about the word "dickwad." An odd concoction, when you consider it. What exactly is a wad of dick? Likewise, "fuckwad." Hmmm.

Urban Dictionary provides 3 definitions for "dickwad."
  • An idiot. More powerfully insulting than its predecessor 'dickhead'
  • A worthless piece of shit. Also known as a wad-of-dick.
  • Commonplace reference to George W. Bush
Ha! Pretty funny for a dictionary!

Both "dickwad" and "fuckwad" have a certain quality of humor that is hard for me to pin down. And like a lot of other insulting terms I enjoy, they have no clear basis from which to become insults. Not sure why, but both strike me as funny, as do some very specific other naughty terms, to wit:
  • douchebag: an actual functional item which a human person does not want to be.
  • dipshit: who the hells knows where this originated?
  • asswipe: compares the inflictee to toilet paper?
  • tool: clearly defines one who is clueless, perhaps having the mental activity level of a screwdriver?
I would like to add some new, crisp, funny bad words to my vocabulary so if you know some, please shout them at me when you are driving.


Hillbilly Deluxe said...

How 'bout "Fuckstick"? One of my personal fav's...

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking of an old SNL skit with Nicolas Cage ...
"Pizza for Mr. Asswipe"
"That's As-weep-ay"

I've always liked dingleberry (Slang. a small clot of dung, as clinging to the hindquarters of an animal.)

Sounds innocuous and silly, but ISN'T. The ultimate stealth weapon.

Anonymous said...

Ever since childhood, I've used the word Nimrod-slightly more polite for mixed company. I think I got it from my sister. It basically means the same as tool.

Anonymous said...

I like Asshat.